Solitude
by Simply Kim
Summary: Sanada was never alone after all, and he never will be. The moment the door opened, he will never feel that way again... because he will finally be complete.
1. Solitude Part One: Alpha

**TITLE: **Solitude

**PART: **Sequenced Three-Part (One of Three)

**PAIRING:** Sanada Genichirou x Kajimoto Takahisa

**GENRE:** Yaoi (Humour/ Continuation/ Angst / Romance)

**DISCLAIMERS:** The series I'm referring to does not belong to me… only this weird story does.

**NOTES:** **Blah **or **_Blah _**is for emphasis. **_/Blah/_ **is for conversations over the phone or flashbacks (if any). _/Blah/_ is for the conscience or whatever inner voice there is talking. _Blah _is for thoughts or random Japanese words. Some of these words are footnoted at the end of every page (I'm beginning to understand the need for footnotes in fiction. Thank you dear friend, you know who you are. XD).

**ADDITIONAL BLAHS: **This is a response to Hanabi Reeza's challenge. I had a lot of fun making this, though when you look at the plotline, well, it doesn't really sow, since it's very depressing. XD This takes place in their senior high and university days. I was having trouble integrating the major characters as junior high kids, since they absolutely have no interaction whatsoever. Sanada is still the vice captain of the team and still under Yukimura. Why? There are a lot of complications, and it will bundle the story up. Kajimoto has some issues as well. This is in assumption that they went to the senior high departments of their respective schools... except for, perhaps... nah, I'm not telling. Just find out on your own. XD Enjoy!

* * *

**SOLITUDE **

_Part One: Alpha_

* * *

**Catharsis** _(Noun)_

Purging of emotional tensions

The act of giving expression to deep emotions often associated with events in the individuals past which have never before been adequately expressed.

* * *

**SEQUENCE ONE: CATHARSIS**

Sanada Genichirou was someone who hated taking the normal route back to his home. Not only was it boring, it was also tiring. Well, it was not as if he was actually **_tired_** physically... it was the emotional aspect he was wary about. After all, apart from all the regular tennis club activities, and since the Nationals was already through, he still had to deal with their new line-up next tournament, explaining strategies to the new leaders of the club, examining effective alternative practice workloads, demanding efficiency and all that jazz.

And then, there was his headache – Kirihara Akaya. The reformed renegade was altogether mellower now, but he still was a handful. Probably because only the captain could fully incapacitate him of his obnoxiousness and delinquency issues.

Yukimura Seiichi was lucky he didn't have to put up with such display of irritating behaviour every single day, and he would graduate without the need to carry such heavy workload. Seriously now, if Sanada had his way, he would've smacked Kirihara on the face as many times as he could just to see the younger boy fold under him. But then, he would have the captain to deal with, and even in such delicate state, he knew Yukimura could still pack him a wallop – going straight like a bullet through his brain. It wasn't as if he hated mind games, he just hated the fact that he was being lectured by someone, much more, a guy his own age... even more – his best friend.

That would be ugly.

Yukimura indeed was his only true best friend. They had known each other since they were young and fighting in such a crucial time would only kill them both. He sighed dejectedly.

"Maybe I should lighten up for a short while... I definitely need a rest." He muttered to himself as he walked through one of his favoured shortcuts home. "Seiichi is so right sometimes that it scares me." The conversation they had that afternoon in the hospital only catered to his present state of jangled nerves. _Now if only that's simple. _He thought, defeated. _Renji is a good manager, but he can't hold Masaharu well. Heck, even Hiroshi can't control that guy. But then all that wouldn't matter since they're also graduating this school year. And then there's the Akaya Phenomenon..._

On and on, the litany lengthened, eyes fixed almost unseeingly as his troubled thoughts ran deep. It was only when he bumped into something that he was jolted away from his deliberations.

**_CRACK!_**

At first, he thought something broke, and briefly, flashes of what were stuffed in his duffel bag entered his mind. When he realised he did not have anything fragile on hand, he focused on what was before him – and what he bumped into.

He frowned.

Okay, so it wasn't exactly something – it was more of **_someone_**.

And not just someone – an **_injured_** someone.

It was the injury that registered first in his mind, and quickly, he picked the fallen crutches up from the cold asphalt road, transferring both in one capable hand before holding out another in an offer of assistance. The pain that crossed Tezuka's features back in the junior high Kantou Tournament was still a fresh memory, and he did not want anyone suffering because of him. He did not want anyone to look like that ever again. He shook his head inwardly and focused more at the task on hand.

The hand that grasped his was cold.

_Strange... it's summer, why is his hand so cold? _"Are you alright?" He asked as gently as he could. Unfortunately, the only response he received was a curt nod.

There was something familiar about him, but Sanada could not pinpoint what it was – or who he was and why there was a sense of déjà vu overtaking his senses at mere touch of skin. Maybe they crossed paths before – but where?

_Great. Another problem. Now I'm not going to be able to sleep. _He thought crossly. There seemed to be a conspiracy against him, and it was not funny at all. Whatever did he do to deserve such punishment? _I'm being too melodramatic all of a sudden. _He shuddered inwardly. _Seiichi's rubbing off on me._

It was the slight wince as he let go that made Sanada realise that the crutches were still in his hand. He carefully handed them to him and steadied him as he applied pressure on the wooden stilts and away from the injured foot.

He was quite certain now that the guy would thank him properly this time – and yet he was still silent as ever, giving him another curt nod and swerving away from him, continuing on his way as if nothing happened.

_What's wrong with him? _He thought crossly, rearranging his bag on his shoulder. _So rude. He reminds me of that Oshitari guy from Hyoutei though... _Shaking his head, he continued his way as well, stopping for nothing, mind occupied once again by thoughts of his team, his captain and his much-needed rest.

_Now where was I..._

**OxxxOxxxO**

He had never seen the setting summer sun so haunting in his entire life.

Ruefully, he stared, eyes fixed longingly upon some distant point where the tops of the huge buildings kissed the formidable shape of the Sun God. It was quite demoralising, the way he was following its path down the horizon like some legendary sunflower deity in Greek Mythology, and yet, here he was, fixated... unable to move but ever-so-slowly as if careful not to disturb the atmosphere enveloping him.

Yet, even in his awe, his heart constricted. Before, when the first few days of summer arrived, he always had someone to share such feeling with. Wakato Hiroshi, the guy whom he had shared a lot with was now off to train with Hanamura-_sensei_ for the duration of summer.

He was supposed to be there as well, training for college tennis, if not for the fact that he failed three out of ten of his final examinations, and, with the Gods laughing down at him, injured his lower back as well. Maybe he should've listened more to his good friend Mizuki rather than his coach. Maybe he should've just entered St. Rudolph in senior high. The way he was arching and bending his back truly did not do him any long-term good. There were pains there, and he was anxious, making him lack complete focus and spraining himself as he struggled to hit back one of Shinjou's completely modernized "Deep Impulse".

In a single snap, Kajimoto Takahisa was a masterpiece no more.

Dropped like a hot potato.

Gingerly, he sat on one of the outdoor tennis court benches, wincing as his foot protested angrily, followed by his lower back, pain searing through him. Great. Now he was not going to get better any time soon. He had his fall earlier to thank for that.

He recognised the one he bumped into instantly. After all, who wouldn't know someone as infamous as Sanada Genichirou, _fukubuchou_ of the senior high tennis team of Rikkai-dai Fuzoku? Why he was loitering around mumbling to himself, Kajimoto did not know, all he knew was the fact that he bumped into someone not worthy of such stupid accident. It was probably his fault, as everything else going on in his life was.

He wanted to challenge the guy before, with an absolute assurance that he would win all matches with, as Mizuki phrased it, "accurate clarity, given any scenario". Now, he was thankful he did not have to face him... him, the player who got injured so easily and couldn't even return a teammate's rally without injuring himself in the process.

He felt deflated... defeated... lost.

What was his purpose then? His parents were indeed rich, but they were never around anyway. And now that they learned he was demoted in the tennis club of his school, he was being given the cold shoulder the few times he saw them in the hallway of his residence. What loving parents they were!

Kajimoto frowned as the last vestiges of orange light winked to black. The lampposts were now lighted, like little fireflies in spring. It was beautiful. And he was happy that he saw such contemporary beauty in all its glory.

He just wished someone was beside him, gazing at the display with equal awe...

Then, he wouldn't feel so alone.

* * *

**Sanctuary** _(Noun)_

Safe haven

Place for rest and relaxation

Peaceful refuge

* * *

**SEQUENCE TWO: SANCTUARY **

It was the package that worried him most of all.

It was polka-dotted red and green. Weird thing was... it was not even Christmas yet.

"Whatever possessed you to buy this for me?" _And whatever possessed you to wrap it up in such monstrosity?_ Kajimoto asked warily, still examining the small package. Suspiciously, he shook it beside his ear, listening to whatever it might be rolling around inside. Maybe it was a bomb, custom-made so that he could just blow himself to Siberia in an effort to lessen his frustrations in life.

"Well, it **_is _**summer, and I thought, when you go out training by yourself, you'd need it." Wakato answered, fidgeting anxiously. _Yeah right, as if I could train now, with my foot and back sore like this. _It was funny seeing him like this, all wobbly and edgy, as if he was desperate for him to like what he gave. To ease his mind, Kajimoto decided to just bite the bullet and open the Christmas-sy package.

Tearing the tape off carefully, he unfolded the wrapping, careful to preserve it after such thoughtful gesture, and opened the small box. At first sight, he froze, eyes wide in disbelief.

_A mini fan?_

Oh no... not a fan,** fan**... a battery-operated one. He stared at his friend, eyes narrowing in suspicion. "This is a handheld electric fan." He pronounced slowly.

"Well, duh!" Wakato rolled his eyes in frustration. "Of course it is, stupid! It's summer already and I thought you could use it after your training, you know, to cool down." He said enthusiastically. "And it's the craze these days! I bought that for you using some of the money I've been saving up to buy myself a laptop, so you'd better be grateful for it!"

"I am grateful, but..."

"And it's just not an ordinary fan, but a **_branded_** one, so it costs a lot!" He rambled on, pushing back his hair away from his eyes. "So, do you like it?"

"I do... but..."

"Ah!" Wakato suddenly crowed, remembering something important, reflexes making a fist of his right hand and slapping it once on the palm of the other. "I forgot the batteries! Well, since it's yours now, **_you'll_** have to get them yourself!"

Kajimoto was not sure if he wanted to laugh at the peculiarity of it all or just pound his friend with his crutches in irritation.

_Maybe the second choice isn't too bad..._

**OxxxOxxxO**

"Genichirou, you really should take a rest."

Sanada glared at his best friend. "I have thought about it. **_Bad idea_**."

Yukimura laughed. "Ah, you can't exhaust yourself too much, the Nationals just finished and we already got our respective place in it. Besides, the university entrance exams will be up soon, and I think you haven't studied enough yet."

"Don't worry, I won't be a _ronin_, if that's what you're worrying about." He said reassuringly, continuing to peel the apple they were supposed to share. Yukimura had never been a fan of apples, and since some idiot gave him a basket-full, it was inevitable that he consumed it. Luckily, Sanada was indifferent to such fruit, and he had a feeling that he would be eating a lot of them in the near future – preferably the next few days.

"Well, I'm worried about you, you know." He said softly. "You're my friend after all."

Sanada handed him half of the peeled apple and smiled. "Stop worrying over trivial things." He chastised. "You shouldn't worry about anything, or you'll get worry lines on your forehead."

"Ha, ha." Yukimura said laughingly. "Humour me. If I didn't know better, I'd say it would be you having the worry lines and not me. You'll look old and gnarly at the age of twenty!"

He shook his head, taking a huge bite of apple thoughtfully. "I can't take a rest now... there are lots of things to do." He mumbled almost inaudibly. "I'm tired of it already, but it's my duty... and privilege as well. No one can handle Akaya but you and me, and since you're indisposed at the moment, I have to deal with it myself. Renji cooked up a lot of weird stuff again. He and Seigaku's Inui are friends again, it seems, and I would hate it if the club members get food poisoned if he passes the stuff he concocted to the next manager. Masaharu-kun is wreaking havoc as usual, with his insistent mimicry, and it's been grating on Hiroshi's nerves recently that they always end up fighting..."

"It should've been me." Yukimura said softly.

"Hmm?"

"It should've been me dealing with all those things and not you."

The forlorn quality in his voice was what perked Sanada up. Playfully, he chucked his arm playfully and smiled. "Stop saying that. It's kind of fun in a way, I could harass them with the excuse of being the _fukubuchou_ again after all. Besides, with or without you present every practice day, I'll still be doing all those things. We're partners, remember?"

Yukimura's eyes smiled straight at him as he nodded in agreement.

"Yes, partners."

* * *

**Unearth** _(Verb)_

Lay bare through digging

Bring to light

* * *

**SEQUENCE THREE: UNEARTH**

Kendo practice was tough, although gratifying. His long-standing rival, the illustrious Saeki Kojirou, lost to him for the second time this week. One more and they would call it quits. Such was the fate of challenged champions.

It wasn't necessarily true that rivals have to be enemies after all. It was just a challenge between the two of them, Sanada thought with a certain degree of amusement. _Like Keigo and Kunimitsu._ The thought alone made him chuckle. It was just fortunate that his private shortcut home was deserted, or else people would definitely look at him strangely. No one in his right mind would ever laugh alone, right? Shaking his head, he looked up, eyes meeting the towering fences that were wrapped around the tennis courts.

As per usual, there was not a soul playing. He had to wonder why the government put it up when it was just going to rot away, unused, anyway. They should've known that this neighbourhood and the neighbourhoods nearby are all from the elite class, and most of them either play golf or play tennis in their private tennis courts.

For Sanada, it was sacrilege even thinking of such weird thing. It was best to play in a private court than a public one – not to mention safer. But, at the rate everything was going for the poor fallow tennis area... he shook his head. _The government sure is spending a lot of money on useless stuff_. He thought with a small measure of irritation. He was about to let his eyes slip away when a sudden distant movement caught his eye. In the dim light of the setting summer sun, he strained, trying to make out what it was. He was sure something moved... _Ah, there..._ He mused cryptically. _I wonder what that is?_

He surveyed the silhouette, eyes detecting hints of what it was instantaneously that he was even surprised by his own ability. It was a person, although it seemed as if the person had four legs... but then, he couldn't be too sure unless he was up close.

It was when it collapsed that his feet starting in their own volition, hurrying straight towards where the figure was.

He miscalculated the distance somehow, and the courts ended up farther than he originally thought, thus, he arrived huffing slightly, heavy duffel bag an added burden. He was right after all. It was not a something but a **_someone_**. A guy. He wasn't becoming senile after all, not like what Renji said the other day. It was a joke, then. Honestly now, coming from that guy, he would never know.

He immediately dropped his bag and rushed to the guy's aid, hands firmly grasping both arms and hauling carefully up. The wooden crutches were quite familiar though...

Then, realisation hit him as the guy gave another curt bow in a gesture of thanks.

He was the one he bumped into last week.

**OxxxOxxxO**

_It's him again._ Kajimoto thought crossly. _This is the worst._

First, he slipped on a wet patch of marble in the cafeteria and went crashing down. Wakato helped him up quickly, straining to keep him from falling again. Worse, his foot ached again after that incident, and he was helped into the infirmary where he met Hanamura-sensei.

His former coach just stared at him and went off. Apparently, he was useless until his foot recovered, but after what happened, he was sure he wouldn't make it soon. So he would be wallpaper for a while, very much a different experience since he was still in junior high. Maybe he should just act like it, then he would really have to be driven furiously out of his misery, and then, he would feel nothing... nothing at all.

And now this.

Some spoiled top-notch kid from the best tennis school in the prefecture was helping him up. Sanada Genichirou, _Fukubuchou_ Extraordinaire.

Was everyone ganging up on him on purpose? Was he supposed to live with such humiliation until the Gods finally give up toying with him and start pitying him?

"Stop doing that."

There was irritation in Sanada's voice, and he instinctively looked up, only to see his brows furrowed and eyes boring holes into his own. "Excuse me?" He asked, bewildered. _Was I muttering to myself again?_ He thought in horror. _Was I –_

"So, you can talk. Well, you never thank people properly." Sanada said, pushing him gently to sit on one of the benches. Last time we bumped into each other, you just did what you did a while ago. You just bowed, and then went off. To others, it wouldn't seem rude, but please, just consider the fact that not all people you meet demand the same type of respect."

There was something about the way he talked that made Kajimoto fall silent. He felt like a kid again, being scolded by the oldest of the family servants. It added more to the humiliation, but he couldn't seem to take offence.

He thought about what happened last time. Well, maybe it bordered on being rude... but he did not know what to do then... and he did not want to deal with another angry face over his stupidity – or clumsiness. He stared down at the cast encasing his right foot and sighed. "Sorry." He murmured almost inaudibly. It seemed as if things were piling up – mostly unpleasant ones – and he hated it. He didn't want to make an enemy of this guy. He had been watching his games for a long time now and had become an instantaneous fan, so much so that he wanted to beat the crap out of him in tennis one day. However, at the state he was in, or even if he practiced hard enough, he would still suck. He knew that his abilities were not exactly up to par, no matter what Mizuki said.

There was a momentary stillness in the air, and he looked up just in time to see the softening of Sanada's eyes as he stared down at him, crutches in hand. He looked imposing in a... friendly sort of way. It was hard to explain, really.

And they stared at each other in complete silence, each regarding the other almost thoughtfully, until Sanada placed the crutches beside Kajimoto and sat down next to them. "You sound like someone I know." He said contemplatively.

"Eh?"

Sanada shook his head and sighed softly before turning to him. "He has matured a great deal since we were young, and frankly, I miss the type of shyness he has... like yours right now."

Kajimoto stared open-mouthed, eyes glassy. There was something surreal about it all. Someone who didn't even know him was sharing important memories. He had never been on the receiving side of such, and it gave him a warm feeling inside. Yes, this was truly the infamous Sanada Genichirou, but no matter how much he looked at it, he didn't seem to be out of the ordinary at all. In skill maybe... but it was all too obvious that he was still human... and a young one at that. He was no different than he was. They both shared a deep emotion not one of them wanted.

They were both lonely.

They were both alone.

"He must've been really special huh?" Kajimoto responded, wringing the hem of his shirt lightly, eyes shying away, off to stare at the last vestiges of light the sun gave.

"He still is." Came the rueful reply. "It's just that, sometimes, I wish to see him acting like he was when we were still children... then, I can protect him again without being told off... and then... I can say we really are partners without feeling like I'm lying."

Kajimoto did not know what to say after such heartfelt confession, so he kept silent. Letting his presence provide some sort of comfort at least.

The silence was thick... but strangely, Kajimoto revelled in it.

* * *

**TSUZUKU **

* * *


	2. Solitude Part Two: Core

**TITLE**: Solitude

**PART: S**equenced Three-Part (Two of Three)

**PAIRING: **Sanada Genichirou x Kajimoto Takahisa

**GENRE: **Yaoi (Humour/ Continuation/ Angst / Romance)

**DISCLAIMERS: **The series I'm referring to does not belong to me… only this weird story does.

**NOTES: ****Blah **or **_Blah _**is for emphasis. **_/Blah/_ **is for conversations over the phone or flashbacks (if any). _/Blah/_ is for the conscience or whatever inner voice there is talking. _Blah _is for thoughts or random Japanese words. Some of these words are footnoted at the end of every page (I'm beginning to understand the need for footnotes in fiction. Thank you dear friend, you know who you are. XD).

**ADDITIONAL BLAHS:** This is a response to Hanabi Reeza's challenge. I had a lot of fun making this, though when you look at the plotline, well, it doesn't really show, since it's very depressing. XD This takes place in their senior high and university days. I was having trouble integrating the major characters as junior high kids, since they absolutely have no interaction whatsoever. Sanada is still the vice captain of the senior high team and still under Yukimura. Why? There are a lot of complications, and it will bundle the story up. Kajimoto has some issues as well. This is in assumption that they went to the senior high departments of their respective schools... except for, perhaps... nah, I'm not telling. Just find out on your own. XD Enjoy!

* * *

**SOLITUDE **

_Part Two: Core_

* * *

**Spectre** _(Noun)_

Vision or image

Apparition or presence of a being, most often ghosts

Phantom

* * *

**SEQUENCE FOUR: SPECTRE**

"You seem happy these past few weeks." Yukimura observed, a smile blooming on his face.

Sanada snorted sarcastically. "Don't make me laugh, Seiichi. After what Akaya pulled just last week, hell no."

His friend shook his head and laughed. "If I remember correctly, your mood changed since... hmmm... ah, yes, after your _kendo_ lesson, when you beat Saeki-san." He raised a brow in supplication. "Is it because of that or is there something you're not telling me?"

Rolling his eyes, Sanada snorted again, shaking his head in complete amusement. "Get it out of your head, I haven't changed at all." He reiterated, peeling another orange for the both of them. "Saeki doesn't have anything to with what I'm doing."

"Ah really?" His friend seemed self-satisfied about something – as if he knew something he didn't. "Then, it must be something else..." he pressed on, leaning forward, placing both hands flat on the surface of the bed, making slight indentations that made Sanada wince inwardly. Yukimura was continuously losing weight.

"No. It's nothing, so stop bothering me. I'm concentrating on this."

Yukimura laughed loudly. "That proves it then. You **are** trying to hide something!"

**OxxxOxxxO**

"You seem sad these days. Is something wrong?"

Kajimoto looked up and smiled as he saw Mizuki's concerned face hovering above him. It was rare that his friend was this much attentive, so he thought it would be best to take advantage of it for a while. Besides, he needed someone to talk to.

"It's Sanada-san."

Mizuki immediately perked up upon hearing the cause of his woes. He stared at him with interest. Kajimoto knew that whatever he was going to say would be filed deep in the recesses of his friend's consciousness... until it would be of use. He just did not know if it was a good thing. Taking a huge breath, he stretched out his uninjured foot and leant back against the metal railings of St. Rudolph's tennis area. "What about Sanada-san?"

"We've been talking a lot lately..."

"You **what**?!"

His eyes narrowed in annoyance. "I said I have been talking to him lately." He reiterated, crossing his arms defensively across his chest. "And all those talks... well... they bother me."

"Why, did he say anything about your injury?" He asked, twirling a lock of hair as always. It amused Kajimoto, the way he did that almost all the time. Wakato seemed irritated by it, however it was different with him. He felt comforted. There was something soothing on the way his finger moved – almost hypnotic in fact. Now he knew why Akazawa, Mizuki's best friend, kept on sticking by him no matter what happened. Maybe it was the main reason why he continued to be Mizuki's friend as well.

His eyes narrowed, spitting fire as if some wild animal protecting his territory. "Please don't tell me he wanted you to join his tennis team, or I swear he will have polka-dotted boxers filling up his closet tomorrow morning!"

Kajimoto tried to keep the laughter bubbling up from his throat, but he failed. Laughingly, he patted Mizuki's knee almost affectionately. "No, no. Don't worry; he didn't say anything about it. Don't torture him with such things, he would be traumatised for life!"

By then, Mizuki was chuckling ceaselessly. The imagery, after all, was so absurd that he was reacting to his own plan of revenge. Who wouldn't panic after seeing their underwear drawer piled up high with polka-dotted boxers? Kajimoto knew he would, his friend though... he wasn't so sure. He was actually thinking that Mizuki **_wore_** polka-dotted boxers everyday! He shook his head in an effort to calm his racing mind and restore himself back to normalcy.

When the laughter subsided, he thought of Sanada once again. He had been thinking about him lately. He knew it wasn't healthy to do such thing, but flashes of his features just came to mind in inopportune moments. Even when he was studying for the college entrance examinations.

Wakato even said he was in love, what with the way he was mooning over him.

Now **that** was crazy.

Why would he fall for someone of his own gender anyway? Besides, even if, let us say, he would be inclined to think that way... it wouldn't happen if he was the only one interested, right?

Sighing, he looked up at the afternoon sky. He knew that Mizuki was watching him, but he didn't care. All he knew was that he was troubled. Maybe it was a bad idea to keep on meeting with Sanada in the early evenings. Maybe talking about his woes were not the best way for him to cope...

"We just talked about a lot of things." He murmured, admiring the way the clouds seemed to roll slowly by, taking their precious time. "About the past... what's happening to our lives now... and what our plans would be in the future. You know, the stuff we've talked about before."

There was silence as Mizuki regarded him carefully. Then, the finger twisting his hair dropped onto his lap and a slow smile spread across his face. "Then why do you look so glum?" He asked almost teasingly. "Shouldn't you be ecstatic that someone as closed up as he is, is sharing stories with you?"

Surprised, Kajimoto's eyes wandered away from the sky to his twinkling ones.

_Why indeed..._

**OxxxOxxxO**

He was late.

Sanada uncrossed his legs for the fourth time. Stealing a glance at his watch; jiggled his feet restlessly. He had been sitting in the same bench for a couple of months now, and he was pretty sure he never waited this long before. Well, it was not as if he waited at all. More often than not, he was the one who arrived late.

Kajimoto had always been punctual. So much so in fact that he arrived much earlier than five thirty in the afternoon that Sanada wondered if he was practicing his swings at all. It seemed as if Kajimoto was not attending his team practices nowadays. Was he only lying when he said he was? He shook his head, glancing at his watch again before crossing his legs.

Impatience was eating him.

_Where is he? _He thought in annoyance. _I have better things to do than wait here all night._

He knew that wasn't quite true, but at the rate he was going, he needed more time to prepare for his dinner than usual, since he was out until eight in the evening. And dinner started at precisely thirty minutes after that. He just couldn't understand that, even with such schedule, he would come here and chat with someone he met only recently. Why was he doing this anyway?

Then, came the footsteps.

He immediately stood up.

There was a part of him that felt relieved. Just as he expected, it was Kajimoto, hurriedly limping towards him. He could stand in one crutch now, and it would only be a matter of time before he didn't have to use its support anymore. For that, Sanada was glad.

But that did not change the fact that Kajimoto was late.

He frowned. "You're late." He said as the other finally reached him, the hint of impatience evident in his tone.

Kajimoto visibly stiffened, and his lips, opened as if in greeting, froze as well, eyes widening considerably. It took a couple of moments before he could recover his composure and he nodded stiffly, schooling his face to its normally gloomy state. Then, an infinitesimal smile, obviously forced, was cracked. "I talked to a friend and I lost track of time." The note of apology was there, and at that moment, Sanada gauged, it was enough. He wasn't angry anyway; he would let it go this one time.

"A friend?" And then, he had to wonder why he was being all too possessive.

"Mizuki Hajime." Kajimoto pronounced, smile widening. "The one whom you like to call 'purple schemer'... I'm sure you understand."

Sanada shook his head. Of course he understood! What he just couldn't understand was how Mizuki and Kajimoto hit it off. That guy was insufferable! He smiled back, holding out his hands and helping him sit comfortably.

There was silence the moment they finally settled down, each lost in their own worlds, each trying to dredge up a memory, an issue, something, anything they could talk about that wouldn't be all too offensive to the other. They had too much quality time weeks before, and their stack of commonalities were dwindling. It made Sanada feel useless, for he couldn't stop it.

Between all banter, all good-natured teasing of friends and even those who weren't, they didn't necessarily have a lot of things they could mutually get excited about – maybe except tennis. However, with the lack of stories Kajimoto had, now that he was virtually kicked out of his team temporarily, related matters were becoming stale. He dreaded the moment when they would have nothing more to say.

He dreaded the moment when they would begin to drift apart.

Sanada was not needy by nature; however, he revelled on the idea that he was needed. And in this case, he felt needed more than he felt in need. It was the ideal scenario for him... and he did not want to let go of it all too easily.

The silence was lengthening. What would be a good topic to bring up... one that he hadn't brought up before? The only thing thought of was...

"It's too hot these days." He commented softly, his brain ridiculing him to the point where he wanted to just stuff his foot in his mouth. _Of all things to talk about, why do I have to focus on the **weather**? _

Surprisingly, Kajimoto did not say a word. He just reached into his bag, pulling out his portable fan.

And with a soft smile, he handed it to him.

* * *

**Ambiguity** _(Noun)_

Imprecision

Indistinctness

Haziness

Doubt or uncertainty

* * *

**SEQUENCE FIVE: AMBIGUITY**

Kajimoto stared at the piece of pristine paper in his trembling hands.

_It must be some kind of joke... maybe the doctor made a mistake? _He thought as he read the lines again and again. He wanted to scream as visions of Tezuka Kunimitsu's pain slashed his mind repeatedly. _Am I going to be like that as well? It says here that I can't bend my back excessively... or use my foot excessively as well... so what now? Tennis is a strenuous game... what will happen to me now? _

The only option was to quit playing. But he did not want to. He wanted to prove to the world that he could do anything – and that he excelled in something, especially the one thing he loved! What was he to do now? What was he to do now that he couldn't stand side by side with Sanada anymore? The hopes of having a match with him were nothing but a dream now. _Damn Shinjou and his stupid Impulses!_ He swore under his breath.

It wasn't until a hand descended on his shoulder that he was jolted from his homicidal thoughts. He quickly stuffed the paper in his opened bag and looked up. It was Mizuki. Letting out a whoosh of relieved breath, he smiled wanly. "Yeah?"

"I saw what was written in that thing you just stuffed carelessly in your bag." Mizuki frowned.

The smile faded from Kajimoto's face, replaced with such a sad expression that made Mizuki's heart constrict. "I need to start from scratch... nix all my moves... throw away all my strengths..."

"Or seek Tezuka-san's advice. He suffered the same thing, right?" his friend offered, sitting down beside him.

"You think he'd listen to me if I ask him nicely?"

Mizuki raised his brow in question. "How **_nice_** are we talking about?"

Kajimoto glared. "Hajime... I'm not going to have sex with him, stop it with the innuendos."

And Mizuki laughed.

**OxxxOxxxO**

"Kajimoto, this is Sanada."

He did not want to do this, but he didn't have a choice. He wanted to be there when news of Yukimura's latest operation arrived. His friend wouldn't have to go through this if his former doctor did not make a mistake regarding the cure for his nerve problems. It shouldn't have been operated at all, and yet, he was subjected to the horrors of the operation table. Now his condition worsened... the stupid doctor cut through the wrong set of nerves.

Sanada only had to wonder how Yukimura took everything in stride. He even said that his doctor did not do anything wrong, and credited it to what he called "honest mistake". He did not even whine about it. But he still couldn't discount the fact that he saw the pain deep in his best friend's eyes. He hated it when he looked that way. He always had to control his temper or he would end up in jail slapped with homicide. If that happened, Yukimura's pain would only increase. It would be useless.

**_/Ah, Sanada-san... sorry I took too long to answer, I'm having class right now, so... /_**

The apologetic note was there, and frankly, he did not know why he was being apologetic when it was him who would... he shook his head. Better this way that for him to wait for nothing. "No problem. I just called to say that I couldn't come later."

The silence was palpable, and Sanada felt guiltier each passing moment. Why, he did not have the slightest idea. Maybe the disappointment present in the silence was the perpetrator.

Finally, Kajimoto spoke.

**_/Oh, I see... well, let's just meet tomorrow... /_**

"I can't. I'll be attending to... other matters." _Like waiting for Seiichi to wake up._

**_/Oh... maybe the day after... /_**

"I'll just call you." Sanada replied hastily.

**_/Oh, okay... see you then. /_**

The guilt was seeping in now. And he had to let go of the conversation if he did not want to change his mind. This was how he felt when he lost to Echizen back in junior high.

"Good, see you then. Bye."

And he ended the call, letting out a huge breath of air and staring at the inactive cellular phone for a moment before slipping it in his jeans pocket.

Why was he feeling this way when he did not lose anything at all?

**OxxxOxxxO**

Kajimoto stared sadly at his phone.

_Sanada-san..._

**OxxxOxxxO**

"C'mon Hi-chan, eat!"

Kajimoto's brow twitched. That accursed nickname again. Why was Wakato always calling him that when he was having a minor breakdown? "Hiroshi. Don't call me that. It's embarrassing."

"But I called you that when we were still kids! There's nothing embarrassing about it! I call you Hi-chan and you call me Shi-chan! I think it's cute!" Wakato said defensively, still holding up the spoonful of pudding before Kajimoto's mouth. "C'mon, say 'Aah...'"

"Hiroshi. My back and my foot are the parts of my body that I injured, **not** my hands. I can eat by myself."

Wakato was about to answer back when a slinky female voice sounded behind him. He did not have to guess who it was. From grim lines on Kajimoto's mouth, he already knew who it was. Sighing, he lowered the spoon back to the plateful of pudding.

"Hanamura-sensei." He greeted lukewarmly.

"Ah, Wakato-kun, it's a nice surprise seeing you here. I thought you're supposed to be training?"

Wakato sighed. "I was, until I got bored with it. I keep on practicing the same stuff, so why bother?"

Kajimoto gritted his teeth. She was ignoring him, the coach he respected regardless of her fashion sense. Now that he knew how inconsiderate she was, he was regretting ever following her lead. She called him her "Absolute Masterpiece", the captain of her team, and yet when he was indisposed, she left him behind. She ignored him. She ridiculed him, putting on airs whenever he was about, especially during tennis practice.

She didn't even reprimand Shinjou. Maybe she did not want him anymore, for all the simplicity his shots were made of. No special formation, no nothing... he just bended his back to make his shots extra perfect. That was it. Maybe he should have just gone off with Mizuki back in junior high. But then what about Wakato? He would be alone in the pack of hungry wolves. He was a friend – a very good one – so he just couldn't leave him like that.

"Ah, but Wakato-kun, you can never be too careless, you know..."

Kajimoto tuned out their conversation. He just closed his eyes and turned away, staring off at the direction of his sanctuary as thoughts of Sanada invaded his mind once again.

_Sanada-san..._

**OxxxOxxxO**

"Atobe... I'm busy."

"Tezuka... I'm busy too."

"Busy staring at me."

"Exactly."

If not for the funny picture the two captains (Again... nothing much changed after all...) made, Kajimoto would've frowned. They looked like they were going to start a riot soon, for all the glaring the Seishun Gakuen senior high captain and all the provoking the current Hyoutei Gakuen senior high captain were doing. He cleared his throat, making Mizuki snigger right behind him... and making the warring pair stare up at him as well. _Heh._ They hadn't even heard him approach... they were too absorbed in each other, probably. He smiled inwardly. "Kajimoto-san." They chorused, straightening almost in absolute synchronisation.

"I'm sorry to bother you, Tezuka-san, Atobe-san... I just came to ask for your help regarding..." Kajimoto started, unconsciously leaning heavily against his crutch. "My injuries..."

Tezuka stared up at him, eyes straying slowly down to the injured foot, then back to his face once more. "There is more than one." He said, eliciting a nod from him. "You have –"

"A problem with your lower back." Atobe finished, fingers almost hiding his intense features, save for his eyes that seemed to tunnel deep down into his body... travelling painlessly to pinpoint his weakness – weaknesses. Kajimoto remembered Hanamura-sensei calling it "Insight". He just never knew how powerful it was until now. He nodded again, eyes stuck now on Tezuka's softening gaze.

"What kind of help are we talking about?" He asked him, leaning forward, elbows planted firmly on the table, chin resting comfortably on clasped hands. It was a bit intimidating for Kajimoto, Tezuka's position right now. He felt like he was being judged of something entirely different. He was almost tempted to scream 'I didn't do it!' at one point; instead, he swallowed and took a deep breath.

"Hospital recommendations, Tezuka-san." He said quietly. "Where I could possibly go for treatments.."

Atobe was eerily quiet, and Kajimoto credited it to the best-forgotten memory of the legendary game back in junior high. He winced inwardly. He did not intend o remind them of that bitter a past... not now when they were getting along fine – more than fine, in fact, that they were bickering so easily, like coy little kids responding to each other's challenges. Maybe this was a bad idea... and why was Mizuki staying silent anyway? He glanced at his friend and found him staring at Atobe's hushed countenance, intensely so that he himself started staring at the Hyoutei captain.

It was only when Atobe spoke that Kajimoto – and perhaps, Mizuki as well, were jarred from their trance. "He went to Germany, but he consulted in Kyushu first. You might want to do the same."

Kajimoto cleared his throat. "Is it really –" He started, only to be cut off by him again.

"It's fine, don't say anything anymore because you obviously are going through a trying time and you need to have your injuries healed, so –"

"Atobe." Tezuka butted in with a wry look on his face. "Stop rushing him. He's not Kabaji."

Atobe glared at him, huffing, as he leant back against his seat and crossed his arms across his chest in a show of defiance. "You're stealing the limelight from me again."

It was Mizuki's voice that followed, with his trademark. "_Nfu_" He went. "_Sasuga_, Tezuka-san."

And Atobe turned his evil eye on him. "And **you**." He fired, irritation palpable. "Oh **_Purple Schemer_**, what are you doing with this decent guy here? Are you stalking him like what you did to Jirou before?"

It took all of Kajimoto's strength not to smack himself with his own bag in frustration. _He wanted to take in Akutagawa-san too? How desperate could he get?_

"I did not!" Mizuki protested. "Takahisa and I are friends... **WAIT**..._**Purple Schemer**_? Why did you call me that? That's mean!"

"Genichirou called you that after you tried recruiting **_Renji_** of all people, and it stuck, so there." His verbal opponent sniffed dismissively.

The name perked Kajimoto's ears. _Sanada-san... _He shook his head, turning away from the scathing display, only to be cuffed by Tezuka's knowing gaze. There was indeed softness in those eyes. They knew how to sympathise, knew how to care... and knew how to help – and those were what he exactly needed.

"I can recommend you to a good doctor to take a look at your injuries first." the Seigaku captain announced solemnly, tearing a piece of paper out of a notebook – Atobe's notebook as his protest indicated, and scribbling something on it. Silently, he wondered what he was writing, maybe the name of the doctor and the place? What to do? A checklist? He had no idea, but he deduced, it would be best if he just waited...

And Tezuka handed the piece of notebook paper to him, eyes more alive now than before. "Here. This is Oishi Souichirou's number, his uncle is an excellent doctor, tell him I referred you."

Nodding, he took the offered reference and stared at it, eyes misting a bit as he read Oishi's home number.

He, for the first time since the arrival of his doctor's report, finally felt hope.

And a silent prayer was said.

There was hope.

**OxxxOxxxO**

It took a week before Sanada was in the clear.

The operation went well and Yukimura was now recuperating – more like demolishing any foodstuff in sight – in his hospital suite. They talked a lot about everything that was going on in their lives and a slip of the tongue followed with him revealing his meetings with Kajimoto.

He was secretly afraid that Yukimura would resent him for lying through his teeth. Imagine his surprise when his best friend **_giggled_** weakly and said that it was all good... that it was amazing he found a new friend.

In a way, it relieving, but the more he thought about it, the more he realised that Yukimura was practically throwing him at another person. It saddened him in fact, but he couldn't find fault in him. To him, all Yukimura said made sense... everything Yukimura was perfect.

He sighed as he trudged in depression to where he usually met Kajimoto. He needed someone to talk to – and fast. As he entered the court, he felt a strong gust hot of wind pass him by, ruffling his hair, heightening the depression even more, and then there was the emptiness. He just did not know why he felt so, if it was because of Yukimura or because... there was no one in the tennis court.

The sight of the empty area made him feel more alone.

Maybe he's just late. He thought as he shuffled absently to their favoured seat and plopping heavily down as he stared at the sunset. There was peace, an unstable one but still peace, and he relished it, taking a huge lungful of breath and exhaling slowly, feeling his lungs emptying... until he felt as empty as everything else was empty.

He stared at the sun until late, until it winked its last light out atop the tall buildings of Tokyo.

He waited for a long time.

Still, there was no Kajimoto.

* * *

**TSUZUKU**

* * *

**_A/N:_**_ made it a three-part instead... I hate squeezing in stuff in just one part. That would be pure evil! . Sorry for the delay guys, just went postal in anticipation of the last ep of PoT since Monday... and now, it's finally gone. But it's not the end... there's still the manga! A consolation of sorts. Well, enjoy! _


	3. Solitude Part Three: Omega

**TITLE: **Solitude

**PART: **Sequenced Three-Part (Three of Three)

**PAIRING: **Sanada Genichirou x Kajimoto Takahisa

**GENRE: **Yaoi (Humour/ Continuation/ Angst / Romance)

**DISCLAIMERS: **The series I'm referring to does not belong to me… only this weird story does.

**NOTES:** **Blah **or **_Blah _**is for emphasis. **_/Blah/_ **is for conversations over the phone or flashbacks (if any). _/Blah/_ is for the conscience or whatever inner voice there is talking. _Blah _is for thoughts or random Japanese words. Some of these words are footnoted at the end of every page (I'm beginning to understand the need for footnotes in fiction. Thank you dear friend, you know who you are. XD).

**ADDITIONAL BLAHS:** This is a response to Hanabi Reeza's challenge. I had a lot of fun making this, though when you look at the plotline, well, it doesn't really show, since it's very depressing. XD This takes place in their senior high and university days. I was having trouble integrating the major characters as junior high kids, since they absolutely have no interaction whatsoever. Sanada is still the vice captain of the senior high team and still under Yukimura. Why? There are a lot of complications, and it will bundle the story up. Kajimoto has some issues as well. This is in assumption that they went to the senior high departments of their respective schools... except for, perhaps... nah, I'm not telling. Just find out on your own. XD Enjoy!

* * *

**SOLITUDE **

_Part Three: Omega_

* * *

**Solitude **_(Noun)_

Loneliness

Isolation or seclusion

Privacy

Lack of companionship

* * *

**SEQUENCE SIX: SOLITUDE**

Wakato dazed thoughtfully at his jittery friend.

"Stop thinking about whatever it is you're thinking, idiot." He intoned, grabbing Kajimoto's shoulder to stop him from pacing. "You don't have to worry about useless stuff. You have Mizuki, You have me, what else do you need?"

_Sanada-san._ The sudden thought came unbidden in his mind. He hadn't been able to meet him this past few days, and he wondered if he had been waiting for him in their meeting place. He did not mean to push aside his friends for him, but he couldn't help it. There was comfort in what they have – even if all they did was talk.

Come to think of it, they never did venture out of the tennis court. Why was it like that? He did not understand it himself. Maybe it was because the place's familiarity put them at ease... and the lack of people as the day comes to an end... or maybe they both did not like the company of many people all at the same time.

From their talks together, he knew that Sanada did not exactly mingle much. All he had was his own special group of people he called friends. There was his best friend, Yukimura Seiichi, his long-time partners in his chosen sport and chosen academy, and then he had his supportive family – and unprecedented rivals like Saeki Kojirou, Atobe Keigo and Tezuka Kunimitsu... possibly, from all his stories, maybe Inui Sadaharu as well.

Sanada Genichirou had that advantage compared to his case.

Like Wakato said, there was truly just him and Mizuki in his life. They were truly, his only friends. Maybe the injury he had did him good after all. He learned who he was and who backed him up. There was no Hanamura-sensei, there were no club people chummy with him. Only Wakato... and then Mizuki from St. Rudolph, in addition to the irony.

He hated it. No, he did not hate his friends... he hated the circumstance he was in. He hated his personality that made him a part of so small a group. He hated the fact that he was no one except for a broken masterpiece, fit to be cast away by many.

He hated the fact that save for two people, he was nothing.

And then there was Sanada. What was he really? Until now, even after all the time they spent together, he still couldn't categorise what he was to him. He felt like he was an outsider when Sanada was talking about Yukimura... And he felt like intruding whenever he asked questions about him as well. Shouldn't friends be comfortable talking to each other regardless of issues? If that was true, then he still couldn't consider Sanada as his own.

Then what of the comfort? What of the security he felt when he was around? What of that? Should he just ignore it?

"I know, Hiroshi, I know." He said tiredly, stepping up beside his friend. "I just feel weird, you know... going away for a while and leaving the two of you here..."

"And Sanada-san as well."

It was a statement, not a question.

He did not have to say anything.

The answer, Wakato saw, was written all over his face.

**OxxxOxxxO**

/**_The heady smell of desire was overpowering, and Sanada couldn't do anything but succumb to it. Body soaked with perspiration, he dipped, the source of his passion hot with want... with need... straining to make contact with the equally throbbing desire a heartbeat away. _**

**_It was delicious, their precious friction, and the initial pain felt between them faded, immediately blown away and replaced by the outpouring sensation of pleasure. Up and down... in and out... they met, they held and repeatedly fall apart with burning abandon, each pleasurable moan striking the heart and the weary soul. _**

**_Breath coming out in short gasps; he stared at the reddened features of his partner, marvelling at the way the contours twisted to that of pure animalistic desire. _**

**_He was perfect. _**

**_This was perfect. _**

**_With a knowing chuckle, he leant close to his ear, teasingly, breathily whispering... "More?" _**

**_And it gratified him to hear the almost inaudible acquiescence. "More..." He moved with him as he intoned the long-suffering words, repeatedly. It made Sanada feel so victorious, as if he had just conquered a nation single-handedly. The silent plea in such words spurred him even more, stirred his passion, and his hands slid down smooth damp skin. He moaned softly, revelling in the tightness of his present heaven. His heaven – all his own, only his own. _**

**_"Mine." He whispered, thrusting harder, deeper, making the other squirm and cry out in primal orgasmic frenzy... "You're mine..." He whispered once more, pressing an open-mouthed kiss on moist lips. _**

**_"Only mine... Ta..." / _**

Sanada woke up gasping, breath so short that he had to get up and open his bedroom window. After a few moments of recovering his composure, he sighed, staring out at the night sky.

Two Weeks.

It had been two longs weeks that he hadn't seen a trace of him, and frankly, Sanada was getting pissed. He hated waiting, and wonder of all wonders, he still waited until eight in the evening every single day in that empty tennis court for someone who had the slightest chance of appearing...

He tried calling him upon realisation that he did not do so when he promised to, so he was partially at fault over what happened, but why didn't he answer his phone then? Was he mad at him for not being able to come because of Yukimura? He couldn't take that against him, after all, Yukimura was his best friend and always comes first before others. Wasn't he being entirely too difficult over such trivial thing?

Sanada's eyes narrowed as he focused on a patch of light in the distance. Maybe something happened... but Kajimoto confessed to him before that he couldn't go anywhere without his cellular phone... maybe...

He shook his head, slouching in defeat. He couldn't believe he was mooning over some guy like a dumped girl. Sanada Genichirou did not do dejected. He is someone on top of everything! So why this? And why this disturbing dream that he had the misfortune of having in the same two weeks that he hadn't seen Kajimoto?

Was he lusting after him? Was that the reason why he felt like he was not complete when he did not see him everyday? But if that was so, shouldn't he have jumped on him within the span of time they were meeting up? Well, he found the former Jyousei Shounan captain good looking – he would be blind not to notice that... and the sparkle of his earrings under the setting sun provided him with that extra gleam that enhances not only his physical features but his personality as well... but... He just couldn't understand it, and he knew that if he did not do so, he would be doomed to have the same dream for all eternity. But was that actually bad?

He groaned. He was becoming as perverted as Niou. He shook his head as images of two bodies merging flashed in his mind. _What the hell... Masaharu, if I see you reading that weird yaoi manga again, I'll kill you. I will make you run a hundred – no, two hundred laps around the court. Tezuka is right when he suggested this 'make your subordinates pay' penalty. I'm sorry Seiichi, but it has to be done._

Convinced that he was calm, finally started shuffling away from his spot by the window, shutting it and drawing down the blinds as he turned up his air-conditioning unit. It wasn't until he felt the stickiness in his hands for the first time that the impact of what had happened while he was sleeping hit him fully.

His eyes quickly stared down at the crotch of his boxers – and grimaced.

"Oh shit."

**OxxxOxxxO**

He was there again, waiting.

He did not know why he continued doing so when he knew no one was going to meet up with him anyway. However, there was this part of him that hoped... that maybe he would see him again.

After thinking hard on it, he realised he was the problem initially. He had been too hasty, making instantaneous decisions that were unprecedented... and at the same time, not bothering to grasp what was between them. He was the source of all the confusion... maybe he was being too sentimental about things, and that proved to be his undoing.

It was not wrong to dote on his best friend, but to dote entirely was all too much. They were not married, after all... no matter how much he wanted to be back then... and until now, there was a small spark of desire to be tied completely to Yukimura. He was being selfish. It was just that.

Just like he was being selfish with Kajimoto. He was being too obstinate, insinuating that he was more important, and manipulating him in a way, even unconsciously, making him the focal point of the other's existence... that everything would have to be about him... that everything was him. Maybe Kajimoto realised it and decided to stop meeting up because he was being too utterly dependent on him now.

He was wrong in deducing that he was not needy by nature, because in actuality, he was. He **_needed_** someone to need him, or else he wouldn't function well... and that drove him straight to Kajimoto. He seemed to be the one who needed him the most, not Yukimura, not Yanagi, not anyone. It was Kajimoto, his sad smile, his defeated frame, his quiet words... and the steel buried underneath.

It was not the lack of things to talk about that worried him as he initially thought... their entire conversations, all the laughter, all the sentiments, they were the one he was worried about the most. It was his subconscious thought that if they talk about too many things, then Kajimoto's burden would be lighter; therefore, the degree of need would dwindle to that of which Sanada did not know if he could take. He wanted him to need him.

It was not the lack of communication he dreaded... it was the lack of connection.

In his absence, he learned the impact just a few unspoken words between two people.

He finally understood why Yukimura was pushing him to meet up with Kajimoto all this time.

He had seen through him.

He did not know how but somehow, he did.

He sighed, taking off his cap.

_It doesn't matter if he doesn't come... at least I'll be able to find comfort in the fact that even after everything, I still waited for him._

**OxxxOxxxO**

Kajimoto was not stupid that he wouldn't know what was happening.

He wanted to answer Sanada's calls before but his body did otherwise. Everytime his phone rang, he just stared at it, inwardly marvelling at the way his name blinked, signalling the source of the call. It was mesmerising, and it was painful.

He hadn't called him either, for the time he was away to Kyushu, accompanied by Wakato who had taken school leave just to be with him. Mizuki, on the other hand was anxious, and said he was going to visit the two of them soon with Akazawa, and probably Yanagisawa and Kisarazu as well.

He was afraid.

He was afraid that he was becoming all too dependent, and it was the state that he never wanted to be immersed into. He didn't want to feel helpless... he didn't want to be needy... he wanted to be stronger. And in contrast to what Mizuki said about how talking problems over would make one more capable... less emotionally burdened.

For him, it was the exact opposite.

He buried his head deep into his folded arms.

_Takahisa, you idiot... how could you be so careless?_

**X o X o X**

Tezuka put down the phone.

"What did he say?" Atobe asked, flipping the page of his book. "Good stuff?"

Tezuka nodded, sauntering over to where he formerly sat and unceremoniously plopped down. "The car is ready, though I don't think Mizuki-san is very happy about it." He answered quietly, picking up his ballpoint pen.

"I wouldn't."

The corners of his mouth twisted upwards in amusement. "I know." He allowed, scribbling some formulas on his notebook. "You and Mizuki-san are very much alike when it comes to those kind of things."

The Hyoutei captain's brows knitted in annoyance. "Don't compare me to that Purple Schemer." He grumbled. "We're very different! I'm way better than he is and I deserve the best!"

Tezuka glanced furtively at him before chuckling.

"No. You're very similar alright... you're both drama queens."

**OxxxOxxxO**

Wakato left him alone in the hospital suite while waiting for more tests. He said he was going off to pick up something to eat at a nearby restaurant. It didn't matter much now, after all, he was used to being left alone like this.

He fingered his earring thoughtfully.

_Maybe I should take it off... so I could at least feel myself changing. _He thought in amusement. _Maybe I would be less sentimental that way; letting go of something I love... but then, wouldn't that be stupid? Wakato urges me to keep it when I told him that earlier... well maybe because we got this together, that's why he protested. Heh. Seems like I'm not the only sentimental person in the world after all. _

He could actually name another person who felt the same way... but it wouldn't do him well to think about him again, lest he found himself lethargic again tomorrow from total lack of rest.

But he couldn't help wondering though...

_What's Sanada-san doing right now?_ He thought, leaning back against the starched cushions of the hospital bed. He was probably studying at home. Kajimoto could almost imagine him with his knitted brows poring over elements and such. It was all too amusing. Then, a thought made him sober up immediately.

_Maybe he's with Yukimura-san..._

**OxxxOxxxO**

Sanada twirled his pen in his fingers absently.

He was supposed to be studying for the entrance exam next week, but there he was, book open on his knee, still staring at the same page he started with an hour before. The afternoon sun was hot against his scalp, and he was somehow irritated with it all.

Why did he keep on coming here?

Maybe he just needed peace and quiet while studying... or maybe he wanted to be alone, to be with the place familiar to him the most – the tennis court. It was stupid. He berated himself for it, but somehow, his feet still chose to wander over to this place.

He had been out of it lately, and this place didn't help much in curing him of it. Instead, it worsened. Sanada knew it was not good for him to keep on coming back to a place full of quiet memories, but he couldn't help it. Deep in his heart he still wanted to visit, as empty as it was.

Because it was where he found solace.

It was where he got his confidence back.

It was where he...

He shook his head, trying to focus once more on his Geometry. He was finally on his way to actually understanding the illustrations when he heard the last thing he was expecting.

His heart pounded wildly in his chest.

His phone was ringing.

* * *

**Camaraderie** _(Noun)_

Friendship

Amity

Solidarity

Companionship

* * *

**SEQUENCE EIGHT: CAMARADERIE**

He quickly cleared his throat and answered.

It was Atobe.

Sanada tried to calm his fast-beating heart. He actually thought it was...

He shook his head. "Keigo, what is it now?" he asked impatiently, twirling his mechanical eraser with his fingers.

**_/"Ahn, I'm hurt Genichirou, that you speak to me so cruelly..." /_**

"Such a drama queen..." he muttered.

"I heard that!" _Wait... _Sanada thought in alarm. _That sounded way too close... _

A click at the other end of the line. There was a flurry of footsteps and something hit him right smack the back of his head. "Ow!" He yelped, turning around to see Atobe glaring menacingly down at him, rolled folder in hand. "Atobe! What did you do that for?"

Atobe Keigo huffed, and sat down noisily beside him, smacking him once more at the back of his head. "You called me a drama queen!"

"But you **_are_** a drama queen!" That earned him another beating. "Would you quit it? The entrance exams are approaching and you're knocking everything I've learned out of my head!" Sanada glared. "Honestly now, you're worse than Seiichi!"

"I can't believe you guys call me that..." He muttered darkly. Sanada had to raise his brow in question.

"Eh? Who called you a drama –"

"**_Don't _**say it."

"Who called you **_that_**... oh."

Atobe sighed. "Who else? Seriously, the two of you are alike in so many ways that it gives me the heebie-jeebies sometimes."

"Yeah right. What gives **me** the heebie-jeebies is you leading the Hyoutei cheer, especially when it's your turn to play." Sanada snorted. "You narcissist."

"Ha! At least I look good doing it!"

He couldn't refute that however, after all, he wasn't blind to such things. So he just shook his head, as his wont whenever he was with his overbearing friend, and snorted. "Right."

Atobe swatted him with his folder. "What are you doing here, sweating in the afternoon sun? Your house is nearby and your room is air-conditioned!" He raised a questioning brow. I hope you're not getting all too sentimental, _oji-san_."

He glared at him for a moment before looking straight out once again at the horizon. "I'm waiting for someone." He answered simply. It was not until Atobe spoke that cold sweat dripped down his temple.

"I bet he's very important."

Sanada sighed. "Yeah."

His friend huffed playfully and crossed his arms across his chest in mock annoyance. "So that's why you sounded so disappointed when you realised I was the one calling! Why, ahn? Do you not miss me for all the time we haven't spent together lately that you have to turn your eye away from Seiichi and my beautiful self?"

"Shut up Keigo."

Atobe laughed. "Honestly though, the one you're waiting for seems important enough. After all, The Great Sanada Genichirou wouldn't wait this long for just someone... and I have an idea whom you're waiting for. It's Kajimoto, isn't it?"

**OxxxOxxxO**

"Damn that evil bastard!" Mizuki swore as he squirmed to get himself more room. "Of all cars to lend, the narcissistic jerk had to give us this **_thing_**! How could we fit six people and a whole lot of luggage in here?"

"At least Atobe lent us a car... ow, Mizuki, _yametekure_ _da ne_!" Yanagisawa groaned painfully.

It was kind of fun hearing them bicker in the backseat. Kajimoto was lucky that Atobe gave specific instructions to make him sit shotgun, or else he would be suffering like the other three caterwauling behind him.

"If you two don't sit still, I'm gonna go all-Kirihara-kun on you!" Wakato cried out from... somewhere underneath all the suitcases. How his friend could even feel the motion around him, or even cry out in protest was beyond him.

"As if you can, you overbearing jerk!" Mizuki retorted in irritation. "You can't even move in there!"

"Good thing you guys are only immobile – Me? I can't even see anything!" came a low raspy voice from somewhere.

_There are four people in the back? Oh... so that's why Hajime said six people instead of five... _Kajimoto thought in surprise, peeking at the tangle of limbs and leather casings. _There are **four** people in there? _He shuddered. It was a good thing he was the fragile one at the moment.

"Atsushi, stop moving _da ne_! Ow, Mizuki, get your toe out of my eye _da ne_!"

_Oh, it's Atsushi... I pity the guy... I wonder how his skin is doing... I hope there wouldn't be any bruises... it is too fine to be subjected to such pressures... maybe I should tell his twin brother about it when we get home... or else he would kill all of us the moment he sees him on the doorstep..._

"What toe?" Mizuki countered angrily, squirming some more, earning another round of curses from the others. "My toe isn't in your eye, you idiot! I'm wearing tennis shoes! The one wearing sandals is Yoshirou!"

Kajimoto finally burst laughing as Akazawa protested.

"Hey, no fair Hajime! I'm the one driving here!"

**OxxxOxxxO**

"He's **_what_**?"

Sanada couldn't believe his ears. It was dark when the story was over, and he was even more surprised that Atobe knew everything that was going on. There was a part of him that ached. Why didn't Kajimoto confide in him? He was there all the time and yet he wasn't trusty enough to...

Maybe he was looking at it all wrong. But no matter what he thought of, everything pointed to him not being trusty enough. How could that be, when he was already baring everything out, all that he was inside? Maybe Kajimoto thought that he wouldn't understand?

Atobe must've sensed his inner conflict, for he patted him twice on the shoulder in a gesture of comfort. "You know him better that Tezuka and I do, Genichirou, so I know you'd figure everything out in time.

Sanada was thankful though that Atobe helped Kajimoto with his problem, and he also knew why. It was all too obvious. From the quiet pain glittering in his friend's eyes, there was a degree of guilt enslaving him, remnants of the one he experienced before out of selfishness and drive to be the victor. In a way, he knew Atobe was not the one to blame for that. After all, his opponent chose to up the challenge; so technically, they were both at fault, yet Atobe was the one who started it all. Briefly, he wondered if that was truly the case in Kajimoto's part. After all, he hadn't seen the Shinjou guy play yet... maybe he should ask Renji.

"Like Tezuka huh?" He murmured, staring at the last vestiges of the emperor sun.

It took a few moments before Atobe spoke.

"Yeah... like _Kunimitsu_."

**OxxxOxxxO**

As expected, Atsushi turned out bruised.

After thirty minutes of explaining to Kisarazu Ryou about what happened to his precious twin brother, they were finally allowed to go by the twins' parents. _More like they were too fearful of the homicidal look on their son's face..._

Kajimoto was dropped off his home, with Wakato helping him with his mountain of luggage. Seemed as if the three Rudolphians would be off spending some time squabbling some more. Turned out, Yanagisawa was right. Mizuki's shoes were taken off because of the luggage by accident and it was indeed his toe poking the poor guy's eye.

That must've hurt.

"Are you sure you don't want me to sleep over and help you unpack?"

Kajimoto turned to his friend and smiled. "No, no need. I'll just see you tomorrow in school."

Wakato turned to the house helps taking away the luggage and glared. "You guys!" He called out, making them cringe. Then, he smiled. "Take care of him for me, okay?" He quipped before flashing a V-sign and rambling out the door.

As his friend walked off whistling contentedly, he remained watching by the door.

He was lucky Wakato was his friend.

_My friend_.

**OxxxOxxxO**

"Well, Oh Great One, do you want to meet up with him?"

He was about to answer when a loud cry of rage rang. "Ah, just as I thought!"

They looked up in surprise, crucial moment broken by the voice of someone very much familiar that it made Sanada's insides cringe.

"What are you doing here, _ahn_?" Atobe asked, brow raised in question. "Stalking Ore-sama again?"

"Oi, oi... I was stalking Akutagawa, not you, you stingy jerk!" Mizuki seethed. "The car was horrible!"

Sanada wondered briefly what they were talking about, only to discover something incredibly thrilling in his part.

He could feel his adrenaline pumping... as if he was rallying for a sure win in one of the tennis tournaments he was in before. "What car?" He asked, gripping his phone tightly.

Atobe flipped his hair and smirked. "The one that transported Kajimoto home."

He could vaguely hear Mizuki ranting about their conditions on the way back, and Atobe snarkily answering back. All he saw in his mind was **_him_**.

"Where is he?"

The bickering pair was momentarily silenced before the Rudolphian team manager gave him a knowing smile. The question was there again; the same one Atobe asked a couple of minutes ago.

"_Nfu_ Do you want to meet up with him?"

**OxxxOxxxO**

"Call his home number, not his mobile phone!" Mizuki hissed behind the bushes lining Kajimoto's house.

"He knows that already, idiot!" Atobe hissed back nastily. "Stop nudging my ribs with your elbow!"

"I'm not! You're the one poking my side with **_your_** elbow!"

Sanada couldn't believe he was doing this. He felt like Romeo from one of Shakespeare's plays, waiting for his Juliet in complete anxiety. And he looked the part too – almost – since he was standing right under Kajimoto's window, looking up in, you guessed it – complete anxiety.

Taking a deep breath, he paced, clutching his phone as if his life depended on it.

"Don't just stand there, dial his number!"

He winced, thinking of the unfortunate souls in the tennis club of St. Rudolph. Mizuki was a drill sergeant – the worst kind – worse than him because of the way he talked. After all, it was not everyday you have someone grilling and drilling you with such airy tone (Not to mention effeminate).

Deciding not to say anything anymore, he dialled.

**OxxxOxxxO**

**RING! **

Startled, he stuffed the medical test results under his pillow. It took him a couple of seconds to realise that it was not the servant bell ringing, nor the doorbell, but his room phone. Letting out a relieved sigh, he stared at the blinking fluorescent numbers on the caller id screen.

His breath caught and he froze.

He knew the number by heart.

**_/CLICK I'm not available right now, got stuff to do.../_**

His recording echoed in the room, making him feel more apprehensive. Maybe he should just pick it up? He shook his head and decided against it, he'd better be well away from the phone this time or he would surely do something stupid. ****

**_/So, if you've got something to say, say it, otherwise, I can't call you back. If you know what's good for you, you'd leave a message after the beep. If this is you Hiroshi, damn you, stop your prank calls! I already know you've got a new mobile phone, so quit it!/_**

If it was any other day and if it was any other person calling, he would've been snickering at his own voice mail.

But...

"Ah... Kajimoto."

It was **_him_**.

"It's Sanada. Pick up the phone. Please."

There was quiet desperation in his tone, and he felt sorry for him, but he was afraid of what he might do. Silently, he reached out, hesitating for a split-second before grasping the phone handle, eyes closed, and he put the receiver on his ear.

"Sanada-san." He answered quietly. There were a few moments of silence before Sanada spoke.

"Kajimoto... Meet me downstairs **_now_**."

He couldn't believe his ears. The esteemed vice captain of Rikkai-dai was **_ordering_** him around! His brows knotted in irritation. He was expecting questions, like 'How have you been?' and 'Are you okay?' or even an 'I missed you.' But what was this? He was Kajimoto Takahisa. He might as well be an invalid now, but he was not going to let anyone his age boss him around like some subordinate! He wasn't even studying in Rikkai for heaven's sake!

"Sanada-san –" He started angrily, only to be cut off by another command.

"_**NOW.**_"

But this one was different. It excited him, so much that he felt ill from the sudden burst of emotion after such a long time of frustration.

"I'm waiting right here, just below your window."

_What?_ The picture of Shakespeare's Tragedy entered his mind. He quickly drew the curtains open and peeked cautiously out. And here he was, looking up at him, eyes wide in surprise, and then softening as he continued gazing upon his form half-hanging out his own window, phone still on his ear.

It was only when Sanada raised his hand in greeting did he react.

He did the only thing he could.

He smiled.

**OxxxOxxxO**

"Ah... isn't that sweet?" Atobe sighed, staring at the two from behind the bushes. "Makes me feel warm all over."

"_Nfu_" Mizuki responded with the same degree of awe. "They sure took long enough to figure each other out, huh?"

"Very much, but something puzzles me..." Came a deep stern voice from behind. "What are you two doing in here?"

They stared at each other for a moment, and finally, they figured out at the same time that neither of them was the one who spoke. With a frightened yelp, they stood up and brushed themselves, staring wildly at the imposing figure Tezuka Kunimitsu cut in the dim light. He was not alone... Wakato was with him – and Akazawa too.

"What are you doing here, _ahn_?" Atobe asked irritably.

"Looking for the two of you." Wakato huffed. "Tezuka-san figured out that Atobe-san here was up to something. And after Akazawa-san returned the car, he called Mizuki up but he wasn't answering, so we gathered the two of you are together... doing something absolutely horrible." He glared. "Are you?"

"No we're **_not_**!" Mizuki glared back. "We were just reuniting those two together! And we did a great job, you know! Besides, how did you even know we're gonna come here?"

"Knowing how your minds work, we put two and two together and figured it out." Akazawa chuckled. "Hajime, we're not as clueless as you think we are." He slid an arm around his best friend's and led him away, sulking. "Come, let's have dinner and leave those two alone."

"I'm coming with you!" Wakato declared, skipping after them happily, arms folded behind his head, all carefree.

Atobe glared at the solemn Tezuka, crossing his arms across his chest as his wont to do when frustrated. "You are lying." He hissed. "Through your teeth."

The newly-retired Seigaku captain cracked a small smile. "Look who's talking." He shook his head slightly, and then tilted it in invitation. "Let's have dinner. My mother wants to see you again. She fell in love with you, I think."

He glared some more before looking back at the scene he had just witnessed earlier. They were still there, still staring at each other as they had been for a long time now. He smiled inwardly. He had accomplished something worthwhile for his friend. It was the least he could do after all the things he and Sanada had been through before.

Then, he turned to Tezuka and smiled. Now, it was time to fulfil something he and Sanada agreed upon when they parted ways. He had to be faithful to what his heart dictated... because contrary to what many people believe, staying with a substitute will never heal the soul.

This time, it will be different.

Just as Sanada's life will be starting tonight.

**OxxxOxxxO**

Sanada laughed suddenly, jarring the quiet moment between them. "Are we just going to stare at each other all night long?"

Kajimoto's cheeks flushed in embarrassment. "Fine, I'll be right there in a minute." He sighed in mock frustration. His heart was beating too fast that he thought he would surely faint if he did not cling to the banister as he climbed down the grand staircase. He felt giddy... he **_was_** giddy... and he knew the reason why.

No more pretenses.

No more hiding.

He heaved a huge breath as his hand gripped the doorknob. He could see the butler eyeing him encouragingly, as if he knew something he did not, and he took that as a good omen.

He wasn't scared anymore.

Because the moment he stepped out of his home...

He wouldn't be alone again.

**OxxxOxxxO**

Sanada waited calmly, his heart was racing.

He finally understood as he waited for Kajimoto to pick up his phone a while ago. He was not alone after all. Not alone because he had people supporting him. Not alone because his best friend was not leaving him behind but actually leaping with him towards another direction. Not alone because the one he had a relationship with remained his good friend even after they ended it together. Not alone because he found more people whom he could trust and trusted him.

And he was not alone because he found the one that filled the empty space in his heart after all this time.

He was never alone after all... and he will never be.

The moment the door before him opened, he will never feel that way again.

Because the moment the door opened, he will finally be complete.

* * *

**OWARI **

* * *

_**A/N:** Finished! So, Reeza, how did I do? I had fun making this, yesh, even if it's leaning on the angst and drama side. I think this is one of my best works... well, of course after I edit it again in the near future. Stretches arms happily Finally done! Well guys, tell me what you think! Now I can finally concentrate more on "Painful Interjections" and "Who Says College is Easy?"! Reviews people! Honest opinion matters!_


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